On grieving parag.micro.blog
@Parag so sorry to hear about the loss of your father. The religiously proscribed process sounds effective in the way you write about. Long standing wisdom. Yes, religions can be wise even where beliefs have faded… thanks for sharing.
@Parag heartfelt post. I felt the same when we lost our mom - the various functions on days ending with 13th actually helped me grieve and start moving on. I still remember my grandpa (her dad) telling me on the 13th day that from now on she would just be a story in my life and nothing more.
@Parag Thanks for sharing this lovely post and having gone through a similar dilemma last year, I can relate. We didn't get the feeling that our relatives would talk behind our back but since my mom had not specified her wishes and she & my dad are very religious, we decided to do it. I did the funeral rites but let my brother do the 10th + 12th combined and the 13th day rites.
The priest was in fact quite frank and said, people usually don't do everything these days and it's ok. The 13-day ritual is already a shortened version of supposedly a year-long mourning period so it's fine if you shorten in more.
Lastly,
He passed away peacefully in sleep with no sign of pain or suffering. I think one has to be very fortunate (lot of good karma) to go like this.
Agree. This is the best way anyone can wish for their own death. The fact that he had his mental faculties intact and was mobile was even better. I'm glad he led a cherished life. May peace be with you and your family.
@Parag First, condolences and heart waves to you and all your folks. Expected or not, these changes are often difficult to navigate, even with soothing balm of ritual and the support of all who remain. You and your family and friends will remember and tell stories about the infinity of moments shared with your pa before this turning point. These stories live on and on, and in my experience, deepened and sharpened the relationship with those departed. ❤︎ ☯︎ ☮︎