All I am going to say is Apple TV screen saver function is just broken. And yes I reset the whole freaking box
@adamprocter We had this problem at my work a couple years ago. I don't remember the exact fix, but it was something to do with our ISP and a firewall blocking the downloads. They're not on device by default and must be downloaded. We were able to get it straightened out, but it was harder than it should've been.